So, I wrote this a while ago. I didn't finish it, but as I was reading it, I figured I better just publish it. I enjoyed reading it, and I think others will also. Here it is:
Time for a new blog!! :)
Time for a new blog!! :)
I was thinking, (like I often do, haha) and this is what came out of that thought...
What is a day? What is today? Why does a day matter? What/how do we makes it matter? Among other things.
I don't know the real answer to those questions, but I have my answer. So, here's what I think. A day is only meaningful if we make it meaningful. I was thinking the above questions while looking at things in my mom's room; and days, things, pets, life, and other things are only pleasing if that is the way you think/feel about them. For instant, your sister's favorite blanket probably doesn't mean anything to you, but to her it means a lot! Security, warmth, comfort, home, love, mommy/daddy, and whatever else makes a child want their "blankey." But, once again, their blanket doesn't mean anything (more than likely,) to you, you'd just as soon dispose/"lose"/wash it as they'd carry it around with them. Another example, a suicidal person places no value on their life, they don't deem it worthwhile, but other people might see a thousand reasons for them to live, and enjoy their life. It is all about perspective. (Tell me if I'm wrong about any of this, I love to hear from you!!) Even to your closest friend something that is so important to you is (might be) insignificant to them. A day- 24 hours. Let's try to imagine a day in various people's lives. Like a whole bunch of mini stories!
The suicidal person:
24 hours of (some or many of them,) hate, abuse, mistrust, failure, depression, lonliness, numbness, (a carefree attitude which is really just numbness,) drunkenness, looking in the mirror and seeing someone ugly, unrecognizable, inhuman, a defect, a deformity, freak, monster... (Possibly many others, many only a few of these.)
You go to work- a crappy McDonald's job that pays just above minimum wage, no one appreciates, even acknowledges you-or if they do they don't realize what you're feeling inside, they can't even begin to help you out of your mess- you mess up-great, another mistake, why don't I just call it quits tonight, maybe it'll work this time- lunch is the same monotonous obstacle, disappointment, letdown, disaster; you head to your table in the darkest corner, the one where the bulb went out and hasn't been fixed, sit down, and eat your wheat bread with meat and cheese. You can hardly bear to eat, everything just disgusts you so! You throw away the rest of your pitiful lunch. The next four and a half hours drag on, but finally you can go home. You've been thinking about the end of it all ever since that big blunder at the office. Home. There is no one and nothing to greet you. No significant other, no dog/cat, that had never worked out. Your home is a dark, dreary hideout, where you can do whatever you want; because no one else cares. You grab a beer from the cheap fridge you'd bother to buy. Beers made everything less. They helped! You sink, literally, into your threadbare loveseat, (there is no one to love here,) to finish you beer. Your plan is fully devised. Time to put it into action. Afterall, actions speak louder than words. That's the end of your story, forever.
The happy, go-lucky:
The sun leaks warmly onto your soft pillow. It is a bright and beautiful day. Time to get up, afterall, the sun is up! Time to go to work! You turn off your alarm, who needs them anyway, and rise and shine! Wednesday, one of my favorites! You pour yourself a heaping bowl of your favorite cereal, and finish eating and getting ready. You drive what other people consider an old, ugly car, but you couldn't love it more! Your just above minimum wage job leaves no room for luxury, but you don't mind! The restaurant is teeming with busy people, already, and you are anxious to join them! Although you are only a waiter, and get lousy tips, you enjoy your job. You put on the rest of your uniform and head out to the early-birds! "Hello! May I take your order?" You ask cheerfully every time you serve a customer. It is especially pleasant seeing all the patrons again. Wow! Luch time already? You take pride in making a different lunch everyday (for the week,) on your small budget.
